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I've written a bunch of times in the past about my recruitment story but since Bid Day was just yesterday at my school, I know many girls will have mixed emotions on that day, and I thought it was important to share this piece of my life again.
The poem above, by Erin Hanson, has played a huge part in my recruitment story. Maybe it's Theta's relationship with the kite, but now anything involving flying makes me super happy. And this poem is even more special because I fell super hard before I learned how to fly with Theta, instead of against it.
I came into recruitment from a really bad place. If you remember my blog posts from a year ago, I had just dealt with a break-up, had roommate struggles all of first semester, and didn't have many friends back home or at school by this point. I knew that I wanted to change all that by going through recruitment, and I strongly believed that I deep down I had the qualities to fit in with one of our 'top' sororities here. For me, this was a chance to break free from the reputation that I had received in high school and first semester of college, and prove myself as an incredibly fun, outgoing, and confident girl, even though outwardly I was having difficulty showing that.
I had a great recruitment week, because I thought wholeheartedly that I would end up where I wanted to be. The only part of recruitment that sucked was the final day, when I opened my bid card and read a name that I didn't want to see. My entire life started moving in slow motion, like a movie scene where everyone else is cheering and chaotic except for the one protagonist that has just gotten the worst news of their life. I spent hours on the phone and I sincerely don't know what I would have done that day if my brother did not go to school with me. I was a complete, utter mess and the world had let me down.
I am a firm believer in the path; the idea that no matter how long it takes or what diversions you make along the way, you are always destined for the same final location. I don't regret anything in my life and I know that what happens is what is meant to be, since you will never be led astray from your perfect path. Every day, I am thankful for being placed on this perfect path, and for something bigger than myself that led me to the right home.
Now, there are five distinct reasons why I believe I was meant to be in Theta (yes, I also believe in funky signs and coincidences):
1. Theta was the only sorority that I talked to about my blogging. Looking back on it now, I think I was hesitant to bring up blogging to any other organizations because it is so unusual and hard to become successful as a blogger - but with Theta I was able to talk about it with ease. Theta made me feel comfortable and I wanted to open up to the girls about that passion in my life. My sisters are so supportive of this journey, and love keeping up with my blogging (hi kites!)
2. The pansy painting hanging in my living room. I never noticed what type of flower they were until I became a Theta, since the pansy is our flower. That painting has been in my home my entire life, and only finally did I take notice of it after joining Theta.
3. My sister, and my whole family actually, love the movie Mary Poppins. Both of Walt Disney's daughters were in Theta, and the kite plot was included as a symbol of their relationship with Theta. Let's Go Fly a Kite is one of my favorite songs from that movie, and Mary Poppins has always been special to me.
4. I also have an unhealthy obsession with KitKat candy, rumored to stand for "Keep in Touch Kappa Alpha Theta." All my sisters know that KitKats are the way to my heart (and skittles).
5. This poem by Erin Hanson showed up in my life, via the Tumblr dashboard, for the first time when I was deciding what I wanted to do about being in Theta. I love that it references flying, because of our kite motif, and it reminded me of the experience that I was having. While I was so worried about being unhappy, I realized that I needed to accept the situation as is. I couldn't change where I ended up, so why not try and make the most of it?
That is exactly what I did. Even though I couldn't understand why I was given a bid to Theta at first, I took on committees, let my opinions be known, and got to know some girls who I felt comfortable expressing these concerns with. The result? Overwhelming love and support. My confidence skyrocketed, whereas before it was very low. I now had social opportunities, and the group of friends I had always wanted. And after some time, I began to see that Theta was exactly the place where I knew I belonged from the very beginning.
Recruitment has just ended, and you may be feeling a lot of the same emotions that I experienced. Maybe you are afraid that you will end up unhappy. Maybe you didn't get your dream ending. What I will say is, the process works. You will end up in the right place for you. Trust the path. It will not lead you astray. And when you think you might fall, remember that you have to take a leap in order to fly.
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